9 tips for husbands caring for wife with long-term illness.

Chronic Illness

Dedicated to Male Partners

    Caring for wife with long-term illness can be difficult and challenging. My wife suffers from two chronic conditions, and thanks to a decade of my personal experience in supporting someone with endometriosis and fibromyalgia, I can give you plenty of tips for husbands, like myself, who care for their wives with long-term illnesses.

    Below you can find my quick 9 tips for husbands caring for wife with long-term illness.

    Communicate with your wife, be patient and understanding, ease stressful situations, help with decision-making, address financial strain, state your own needs, take care of yourself, connect with others in your, and seek professional help if you need it.

    In the following paragraphs, I’m going to expand on these tips in more detail. I’m going to discuss them one by one:

    1. communicate with your wife
    2. be patient and understanding
    3. ease stressful situations
    4. help with decision-making
    5. address financial strain
    6. state your own needs
    7. take care of yourself
    8. connect with others in your
    9. seek professional help if you need it

    Let’s get started!

    9 tips for husbands caring for wife with long-term illness.

    Caring for a wife with a long-term illness can be challenging. Like one psychologist said here: “Even in the best marriages, it’s hard. You feel trapped, out of control, and helpless.”

    My marriage was also a little bit wobbly, but today it blossoms. It’s important for you to remember that you are not alone.

    There are many resources and people who can help you through this difficult time. Use these tips to make the best of a difficult situation and to support your wife in her battle against her illness.

    One of the best of such resources is eBooks based on chronic illness. However, usually they are written by and for the people who suffer from chronic conditions. It is rare to find a book written by and dedicated to the male partners of chronically ill women.

    This is why I wrote one myself because I noticed what was missing. If you are interested in my book, “Supporting a Chronically Ill Partner” is going to help you learn how to cope with your partner’s chronic illness, how to support her struggles, and manage a relationship with a chronic condition, I give you the Chapter FREE!

    This chapter alone has all the comprehensive information about acknowledging the struggles, including:

    • A word to your partner.
    • A word to you.
    • Stepping on eggshells.
    • Understanding her needs.
    • How to acknowledge having a chronically ill partner?
    • Acknowledging can be hard.
    • 15 tips on how to do it!

    Get the 1st Chapter FREE!

    Chronic Illness for Partners

      There are many things you can do to help your wife.

      Before I give you some tips relating to caring for wife with endometriosis, and caring for wife with fibromyalgia, I give you more in-depth information about caring for wife with chronic illness.

      1. Communicate with your wife.

      One of the best things you can do as a husband caring for your wife with long-term illness is to keep the lines of communication open.

      This means being a good listener, letting her know that you are there for her, and being understanding and patient. If she is having a bad day, give her a hug or just be there for her in whatever way she needs.

      Find a way to talk openly about the challenges that your partner’s illness brings. This can help to reduce stress and anxiety and make it easier to cope with day-to-day challenges.

      2. Be patient and understanding.

      It can be difficult to see your wife suffering and in pain, but it is important to be patient and understand that her illness is not her fault. Be there for her when she needs you, and try to do things that will make her feel better.

      It can not always be easy, especially if your wife’s chronic illness makes her feel frustrated, or she even blames you for things you haven’t done or weren’t aware of. It can be hard to be patient because chronic illness makes your wife repeat things over and over.

      Being understanding can be difficult for men who are used to being in control and solving problems. With chronic illness, you often can not “fix” the problem, no matter how much you want it.

      3. Ease stressful situations.

      There will be stress, and there will be a lot of situations that are going to make both of you feel stressed.

      Stress can make a long-term illness worse, so do your best to ease stressful situations for your wife. If she is worried about something, help her to find a solution or just listen to her and offer your support.

      I often catch myself taking a lot on the cheek, including my wife’s frustrations, because I don’t want to aggregate her even more with my own feelings. But negative emotions need to be addressed. Otherwise, you are going to burn out, or develop so-called “compassion fatigue”.

      4. Help with decision-making.

      Many decisions need to be made when someone is suffering from a long-term illness, and as the husband, you can help your wife by being involved in the decision-making process.

      This may include decisions about treatment options, lifestyle changes, or financial matters. And remember, your wife may be ill, but she is and wants to feel, independent. Don’t take her independence away trying to take control over everything.

      Decision-making can be difficult when you are both under stress. Be patient, and try to reach a decision that is best for both of you.

      5. Address financial strain.

      chronic illness brings a big financial burden. Your wife may have lost income due to the illness because it can be impossible for her to keep a job, or at least she has to cut her hours.

      What helps in such situations is working from home. Blogging is the best way to make money when your chronically ill wife struggles to work due to her symptoms.

      in addition, she may have increased medical expenses, or in more severe cases of an illness, remodeling your home to her needs may bring costs up. Also, you are the caregiver and you may not be able to leave a job you don’t like because of problems with insurance, or because your wife is afraid of you not being able to find a new job.

      A long-term illness can put a lot of financial strain on a family, so it is important to address this issue. Talk to your wife about her concerns and fears, and work together to find ways to reduce the financial burden.

      9 tips for husbands caring for wife with long-term illness 1

      6. State your own needs.

      It is important to remember that you have needs too, and stating them is not selfish. It is not only your wife who is impacted by her illness, you are too!

      It is important not to gaslight your own needs and concerns.

      Your wife may be so focused on her illness that she forgets about your needs, so make sure you tell her what you need from her.

      Whether it is more help with the housework or just some extra understanding, she will be more likely to meet your needs if she knows what they are.

      Your wife may give mixed messages. When feeling good, she may want to do things on their own but then become resentful when you don’t step up to help when she isn’t feeling well enough to do it on her own. I get that all the time.

      I know that her hormonal imbalances play a big role in the fluctuations of her mood.

      7. Take care of yourself.

      As the husband of a woman with a long-term illness, it is important that you take care of yourself both physically and emotionally.

      This may not always be easy if you constantly feel like you need to prioritize your wife, but simple things such as eating a healthy diet, getting regular exercise, and taking time for yourself to relax and de-stress should do the trick.

      If you are not taking care of yourself, you will be less able to care for your wife.

      8. Connect with others in your situation.

      Think about it, you are doing it right now. You are reading this article, and maybe you have in mind leaving a comment at the bottom of the page. This is a way of reaching out.

      Apart from me, there are likely others in your situation who understand what you are going through.

      Connecting with them can help you to feel less alone and can give you some great tips and advice. You can find others in your situation by joining support groups or online forums. Or read more blogs like Worry Head.

      I don’t mind if it’s not my blog, just reach out to others, for your benefit.

      9. Seek professional help if you need it.

      If you are finding it difficult to cope with your wife’s illness, don’t be afraid to seek professional help. A counselor or therapist can provide you with the support and guidance you need to get through this tough time.

      I know how hard it can be for you because we (men) are meant to be the strong ones and not show any weakness, but this is not a sign of weakness. This is a sign of being human.

      So, if you need professional help, don’t hesitate to contact them. You will NOT regret it.

      Caring for wife with endometriosis.

      Knowing how to care for wife with endometriosis may seem like a daunting task because there is so much you need to learn in order to be supportive.

      Endometriosis is a chronic illness that affects women of childbearing age. It occurs when the tissue that is similar to the one that lines your partner’s uterus. This diabolical condition can cause severe pain, heavy bleeding, and chronic fatigue.

      There is no cure for endometriosis, so this makes things worse because your wife is most likely to have repetitive surgery.

      Caring for wife with endometriosis may seem like a daunting task because there is so much you need to learn in order to be supportive.

      • Begin with understanding what endometriosis is, the symptoms, and the available treatments.
      • Next, you need to be supportive of your wife when she is going through a tough time. This means being understanding and patient when she is in pain
      • Thirdly, you need to take care of yourself both physically and emotionally. This is because if you are not taking care of yourself, you will be less able to care for wife with endometriosis.

      Caring for wife with endometriosis is no different from caring for wife with fibromyalgia, and any chronic illness for that matter. There are plenty of similarities. What differ caring for wife with endometriosis is that there is no cure, and your wife will likely have to go through surgery again and again.

      The best thing you can do is to be understanding and supportive. Be there for her when she is in pain, and take care of yourself both physically and emotionally. These are the best tips I can offer you as the husband of a wife with endometriosis.

      Caring for wife with fibromyalgia.

      Knowing how to care for wife with fibromyalgia, you need to learn the basics about this chronic disorder.

      Fibromyalgia is a chronic disorder characterized by widespread musculoskeletal and nerve pain, fatigue, sleep, memory, and mood problems.

      The cause of fibromyalgia is not known, but it is believed to involve a combination of genetic and environmental factors.

      There is no cure for fibromyalgia, but treatments can help reduce the symptoms.

      If your wife has fibromyalgia, then you probably know how difficult it can be to deal with the condition. The pain can be debilitating, and the fatigue can make it hard for your wife to do anything.

      The same tips apply caring for wife with fibromyalgia as caring for wife with long-term illness. To name a few, you need to be understanding and supportive, take care of yourself both physically and emotionally, and seek professional help if you need it.

      In addition, you should also try to learn as much as you can about fibromyalgia. The more you know about the condition, the better equipped you will be to support your wife.

      Get the 1st Chapter FREE!

      Chronic Illness for Partners

        To finish off…

        To summarise the whole article in a nutshell, if you are a husband caring for wife with long-term illness, the best thing you can do is to be understanding and supportive. Be there for her when she is in pain, and take care of yourself too.

        Remember that your wife is most likely to develop anxiety and depression, which means that you should also be on the lookout for these mental health conditions. If you notice any changes in your wife’s mood or behavior, don’t hesitate to seek professional help.

        These are the best tips I can offer you as the husband of a wife with chronic illness.

        To finish off, a quick reminder about my book below…

        Signature Lucjan
        Lucjan B

        About Me

        Hi, I’m Lucjan! The reason why I decided to create this blog was my beautiful wife, who experienced a lot of pain in life, but also the lack of information about endometriosis and fibromyalgia for men…

        2 thoughts on “9 tips for husbands caring for wife with long-term illness.”

        1. Hi Mike,

          Unfortunately, we are not experienced with Parkinson’s Disease, only endometriosis, and fibromyalgia. I wish I could comment on it, however, I can’t.

          I hope someone else will have some experience in this particular condition.

          I know that good old Michael J. Fox runs a foundation on the topic. It is worth looking at:

          https://www.michaeljfox.org/news/depression-anxiety#:~:text=Mood%20Changes%20in%20Parkinson's&text=But%20mood%20disorders%20such%20as,the%20course%20of%20their%20disease.

          Reply
        2. Is anyone else out there caring for a wife with Parkinson’s Disease? I’d be interested in hearing from anyone with tips on how to handle the ups and downs of her moods, how to handle the bad days, and how to take advantage of the infrequent good days. It’s tough when the pain leaves her unable to get out of bed, or when the apathy rears its head and she just doesn’t care………about anything. How do you cope? How do you handle it all? I’m all ears!!

          Reply

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