Endometriosis divorce rate: saving a marriage from divorce.
What do I know about the endometriosis divorce rate?
Do I know anything about the endometriosis divorce rate and can it help to save your marriage?
Yes. I know about endometriosis rate divorce. Additionally, my wife asked me to divorce her on three separate occasions.
Each time I refused to gain a lot of experience and learned how to avoid it!
There are countless blogs on the subject of endometriosis from the perspective of the sufferer but it’s rare to see their male partner’s point of view.
This is where the problem begins because people usually find information about one side of the story. You need to know both.
Not knowing what your supporting partner feels makes women upset and angry because they think that their partner doesn’t care about them.
Sure, in some cases it may be true, however, the majority of us truly love our women. We just feel a bit lost and don’t know what to do.
Our instinct tells us to fix things. Even though we can’t fix endometriosis it’s in our nature to try.
This is an impossible task. Not being able to fix makes some guys feel useless and less of a man.
If you only know your partner’s pain it’s difficult to understand them. That leads to a lack of communication.
The lack of communication leads to arguments, and ultimately, to divorce.
This is why I created “Endo-Tool” a book for men, to help them understand endometriosis, and how to cope, and support their partner in her battle with this insidious chronic condition. If you decide to join, you can get a FREE 1st chapter containing 20 pages filled with pure value, such as:
- What is endometriosis?
- What are the symptoms?
- What causes endometriosis?
- What does endometriosis look like?
- What are the stages?
- What are the types?
- What is adenomyosis and how is it related to endometriosis?
- Why do some women develop severe endo and others don’t?
- Does endometriosis cause infertility?
- How is endometriosis diagnosed?
- Do types and stages affect the treatment?
- Recurrence of endometriosis after excision surgery.
Get FREE “Endo-Tool”
Endometriosis for Men e-Book
Endometriosis divorce rate.
Experts say that chronic illnesses increase the risk of divorce from the norm of 40-50% to as much as 75%.
Saying that amongst couples with endometriosis divorce rate raises because there are other issues that often occur, such as loss of sex life.
Based on my marriage I’ve learned two things:
- Men struggle to cope with new adjustments in their lives and leave their women.
- Women feel guilty for their partner’s loss and ask their husbands to leave them.
My wife and I belong to the latter. M sufferers from endometriosis and fibromyalgia. Both illnesses impact her mental health.
Why within chronic illnesses like endometriosis divorce rate is higher than other conditions?
Because affected women have a higher risk of being infertile, not to mention painful sex.
Luckily for M, I didn’t mind not having kids. Sure, knowing that she will never have kids of her own was a traumatic experience.
However, my opinion on the matter made her feel less guilty as I had nothing to lose.
But the majority of men want kids, and not being sure if they will be able to have children makes them hesitant.
On its own, this is one of the biggest traumatic experiences they may encounter. Let’s add the lack of sex to it…
Pain during sexual intercourse can be unbearable for women who have endometriosis.
Women feel guilty every time they refuse sex. Their pain is too much to bear.
But no one talks about men who feel the loss. They are more likely to have an affair. That itself leads to betrayal and broken hearts.
But the impact of endometriosis on the couple’s sex life and a higher risk of infertility isn’t all married people have to deal with.
The emotional, mental, and psychological toll this chronic illness has on the couple is another reason for the higher endometriosis divorce rate.
Anxiety over the unknown future, depression caused by trauma, loss, guilt, and grief, are among the issues.
It causes my wife Irritable Bowel Syndrome since endometrial tissue reached her bowel. In addition to that, she developed various kinds of food intolerance.
She can’t eat dairy products, red meat, sugar, most fruits, and she had to cut down on caffeine.
For an Italian woman like my wife not having her beloved coffee is a big deal. But let’s not forget these lovely kinds of food she can’t have…
Endometriosis made her diet extremely restricted and difficult to manage. Sure, it’s doable to bother meals became repetitive and boring.
You wouldn’t think it affects a man but the truth is, we cannot go to a restaurant with our wives like we used to. The menu isn’t designed for women with endometriosis.
Also, going to a party with other people isn’t an option anymore.
Even friends don’t understand what we are going through.
We have to cancel some of our meetings because of the endometriosis flare-ups that unexpectedly occur.
Saving marriage from divorce amongst couples with endometriosis isn’t easy. Everything seems to work against the affected couple.
Even physically healthy relationships have problems.
But endometriosis can be a big deal if there is no communication and understanding between two people.
Loving a woman with endometriosis can be challenging to begin with, but I’ve learned after 13 years how to manage our ups and downs.
One of the ways to help my wife with her endometriosis was to educate myself about her disabling condition. I found many books in my time, but one stood out the most. It was “Endometriosis – Healing from the Inside Out” which you can check and access below. This book dives deep into the whole topic of using a vast range of safe natural therapies and nutrition to help manage endometriosis.
Leaving aside the marriage as a whole, I’d like to tackle a separate matter – caregivers.
Because after all we, men, become caregivers to our beloved wives.
We hear so much about female endometriosis’s point of view. It’s time to talk about male partners who support them.
What is the impact of endometriosis on male partners of women with this condition?
There are plenty of awesome men like yourself who understand the importance of not giving up and they stick by their partners.
If you weren’t one of them you wouldn’t read this article. It means you care. Thank you!
There are support groups made of such men like us, under the concept of “Mendo,” men who love women with endometriosis.
I’m a man who loves his wife. I don’t belong to such groups because I decided to create and dedicate my entire blog to the topic of men supporting their chronically ill partners.
Endometriosis has been shown to negatively impact women’s quality of life, but really little is known about the impact on male partners.
Endometriosis significantly impacts negatively emotional well-being of men.
Men report that endometriosis affects many aspects of their lives including sex and intimacy, planning for having children, work, and therefore income.
They are required to take on additional tasks and roles.
My wife takes good care of herself and there are no flare-ups, her endometriosis doesn’t affect me much.
She tries not to put pressure on me, but sometimes it isn’t possible. Especially when the illness causes extreme stress, anxiety, and depression.
I become her nurse, her cook, shopper, cleaner, advocate, breadwinner, and more…
Endometriosis has an impact on men’s emotions. I felt helpless, frustrated, worried, and angry at times.
Despite endometriosis having an impact on male partners, there is a lack of support available to men. We are often marginalized and forgotten.
Healthcare practitioners should take more care of couples as a whole because they usually focus on females only.
Endometriosis has a negative effect on the sexual function of women and the strain on intimate relationships is really big.
This, in some cases, contributes to relationship breakdown therefore there is a higher endometriosis divorce rate than among couples without this condition.
Sex with endometriosis!
But again, studies are primarily focused on women’s accounts and our male voices remain absent.
Fair enough, after all, women suffer from pain and other symptoms.
When women experience endometriosis pain, sex can become unbearable.
Take for instance a romantic evening. You plan it and everything seems to go well, but you cannot really seem to relax.
One wrong move might put you in pain so severe that it lasts for days.
So, planning a nice romantic dinner, or even going out with friends, may end in agony. The unknown of its occurrence makes women anxious and frustrated.
With endometriosis, tissue similar to the lining of the uterus grows in other parts of the pelvis and abdomen.
It can occur around or on the ovaries, behind the uterus, on the tissues that hold the uterus in place, or on the bowels or bladder.
It can reach the bowel, which like in my wife’s case, becomes deep infiltrating endometriosis. It’s the most severe, stage 4.
Some women with endometriosis feel no pain at all during intercourse, but for my wife, sex is too painful to bear (it’s called dyspareunia).
Some women’s endometriosis pain can make physical intimacy unbearable to the point it even breaks up marriages.
That’s because their endometriosis is in the small space behind the cervix and lower uterus. When endometriosis gets into that space, it widens it causing extreme pain.
It also causes nerve endings to grow and the tissues to get inflamed. The tissue around the area becomes stiff.
If that area is hit during intercourse, pain can be really excruciating!
And can also last for days, because nerves become irritated to the point that they keep firing over and over, sending impulses to the brain.
Apart from the nerves, endometriosis also causes fluids to leak from the tissues, which results in spreading, causing inflammation in the pelvic area.
The female reproductive organ is supposed to be elastic. But endometriosis causes stiffness and pulls on other structures in the pelvis, which can a woman very uncomfortable.
So, after fertility issues, sexless life is one of the primary reasons for couples with the endometriosis divorce rate being high.
Saying that you don’t have to have a sexless life!
Sex isn’t only about penetration. Sex is wonderful because you can explore and experiment.
By searching and discovering new things, your sex life doesn’t have to be boring.
I asked my wife a direct question since penetration hurts her so much – what about oral sex – does it hurt?
The answer was a clear “no”.
And gentlemen, let’s face it – which one of us doesn’t like oral sex? Exactly!
I say that because (unfortunately) for the majority of men sex is about the finish and release.
Women prefer more time, preparation, and a more intimate touch. For them isn’t it about the penetration but the experience as a whole.
I just mentioned oral sex because a man would give you anything just to receive oral sex. Men are easily sexually pleased.
So ladies, if you want to keep your man and endometriosis pain doesn’t allow you to penetrate, oral sex is one of the easiest solutions.
But let’s not forget that you can experiment with other things. Women are naturally submissive, men are dominant in nature.
Grab some ties and handcuffs, play a little, see what you both like. Trying won’t hurt.
In the worst-case scenario, you give it a go, in the best-case scenario, you’ll love it!
Not many men are into prostate massage because it makes them feel less masculine, but it happened that mother nature blessed us with prostate up the… we can’t help it.
It doesn’t make you gay, but if you haven’t tried it, you miss the biggest pleasure a man can experience.
But enough sex talk!
Some useful tips…
Here are 10 tips that can help keep your intimate relationship healthy:
- Get proper medical treatment.
- Don’t put your relationship on hold.
- Talk it over.
- If something hurts, stop doing it.
- Try new things.
- Wait until you’re ready.
- Change positions.
- Let your body do the talking.
- Keep working at it even after surgery.
- If you need more help, find it.
Additionally, I give you 15 caregiving tips on how to support a partner with chronic illness:
- Find support.
- Get help.
- Make time for yourself.
- Be kind to yourself.
- Identify personal barriers.
- Try to be patient.
- Don’t stop learning.
- Remember your loved one.
- Approach caregiving with your heart.
- Be respectful.
- Be sensitive.
- Trust in your ability to be a caregiver.
- Know your limits.
- Try not to be judgemental.
I hope you found here useful information about the endometriosis divorce rate and how to save your marriage from divorce…
I wish you both luck and cross my fingers for you.
Take good care of yourselves!
Hi, I’m Lucjan! The reason why I decided to create this blog was my beautiful wife, who experienced a lot of pain in life, but also the lack of information about endometriosis and fibromyalgia for men…