The perfect marriage despite endometriosis.
Achieving the perfect marriage despite endometriosis requires open communication, patience, and a willingness to adapt. Prioritizing emotional connection, seeking professional help, and managing pain effectively can also help strengthen the relationship.
But is there really such a thing as a perfect marriage despite endometriosis?
Well, as a husband to a chronically ill woman, I have come to understand that marriage is more than just love and romance. It is about companionship, support, understanding, and most importantly – patience.
My wife suffers from stage 4 endometriosis, and her endo is deeply infiltrating.
Normally, endometriosis is characterized by the growth of tissue similar to the lining of the uterus outside its usual location which can cause severe pain during menstruation and intercourse along with infertility as well in some cases. But deep infiltrating endometriosis is on a deeper level. Literally.
My wife also developed fibromyalgia, a disorder I talk about in my other blog posts. Endo is her primary chronic condition, and when she was diagnosed with it, it felt like our world had changed overnight.
But over time we’ve created what many might consider an unbreakable bond – the perfect marriage despite endometriosis. In this article, I will share how we managed to keep our relationship strong even though dealing with a chronic illness isn’t easy for anyone involved.
- What is the meaning of a good marriage?
- Stages of a dying marriage…
- How endometriosis diagnosis affected our relationship?
- My take on endometriosis divorce rates.
- Journey to finding the perfect marriage despite endometriosis.
- Marriage Helper.
- The marriage bed.
- Marriage heat vs physical pain management.
- Broken vow in marriage.
- A final word on the perfect marriage despite endometriosis.
What is the meaning of a good marriage?
A good marriage should be built on mutual respect, trust, and understanding between both partners knowing each other’s likes and dislikes while being able to communicate effectively amidst any situation life throws at them.
This includes illnesses such as endometriosis, and showing empathy towards your partner’s needs shows you care deeply about their wellbeing beyond the measures imaginable.
To me, a good marriage means having a strong foundation built on mutual respect, trust, and understanding. It’s about being able to communicate with my partner openly and honestly, even when we may not see eye to eye on certain issues. Knowing each other’s likes and dislikes is crucial in creating a bond that is built to last, as it allows us to appreciate each other’s individuality and unique personalities.
In addition to this, I believe that a good marriage is also about being there for each other through thick and thin, no matter what life throws at us. Whether it’s dealing with an illness such as endometriosis or navigating the challenges of parenthood, I want to be able to show empathy toward my partner’s needs and prioritize their well-being above all else.
At the end of the day, a good marriage is about being each other’s rock and supporting each other through all of life’s ups and downs. It’s about creating a partnership that is built on a foundation of love, trust, and understanding, and I am committed to working towards that goal every day.
Stages of a dying marriage…
We need to understand that every couple goes through seasons or stages within their marriages where one may change mental states.
When the marriage heat burns low, sexless, or loveless relationships are at risk of a breakdown. I actually wrote an article on why endometriosis breaks relationships, and what you can do about it. Because if couples don’t take appropriate steps and face their challenges, the endometriosis divorce rate risk is very high.
As many as three out of four marriages break!
In my experience, I’ve come to understand that every marriage goes through seasons or stages. There may be times when one or both partners go through mental or emotional changes, causing the passion in the relationship to dwindle. This can result in a sexless or loveless relationship, and if appropriate steps aren’t taken to address these issues, it can eventually lead to divorce.
I believe it’s important to recognize these stages of a dying marriage and take steps to address them before it’s too late.
For me, communication is key. If I notice that my partner and I are drifting apart, I try to have an open and honest conversation with them about what’s going on. This allows us to work through our issues together and find ways to reignite the passion in our relationship.
It’s also important to seek outside help if necessary. This could mean seeing a therapist or counselor to work through any underlying issues or seeking medical treatment if there are physical or medical conditions causing the decline in the relationship.
At the end of the day, I believe that a dying marriage can be saved with the right attitude and approach.
It takes effort, patience, and a willingness to work through the challenges together. By recognizing the different stages of a dying marriage and taking proactive steps to address them, couples can strengthen their bond and build a relationship that is built to last.
How endometriosis diagnosis affected our relationship?
When my wife was diagnosed with endometriosis, it had a significant impact on our relationship.
I remember the day before our wedding, she was so sick that she was vomiting uncontrollably. Of course, I knew it wasn’t because she was having second thoughts about marrying me (at least, I hope not!), but because of the unusual symptoms, she had been experiencing for months leading up to that day.
It all started back in 2012 when my wife began to notice that her periods were becoming increasingly painful and lasting longer than usual. Despite trying various medications, the pain persisted, and eventually, we sought the advice of specialists who confirmed that she had endometriosis.
We were both shocked and scared, but we knew that we had to take action to manage her condition.
The road to recovery wasn’t easy, and we know today that it doesn’t have an end.
My wife had to undergo surgery almost immediately after her diagnosis. As I write this, she waits for her second surgery.
Watching her go through that experience is incredibly difficult, but I try to be there for her as much as I can. I remember feeling helpless at times in the past, wishing that there was more I could do to ease her pain. But even though I cannot erase it today either, I have learned what triggers it.
Stress is the number one trigger, and though there are many others, stress will always be the biggest reason for her flare-ups and the chronic fatigue that follows them.
How did this condition change our marriage?
Despite the challenges that we faced, our relationship grew stronger. We learned to communicate better and support each other through thick and thin. We made a commitment to work together to manage my wife’s endometriosis, and I am proud to say that we have come a long way since her diagnosis.
In the end, I believe that my wife’s endometriosis diagnosis ultimately brought us closer together.
We learned the importance of being there for each other, even during the toughest times, and I am grateful for the bond that we share as a result of this experience.
Endometriosis forced us to alter our lifestyles, support systems, and communication about what was going on. We adapted, which strengthened the bond between us.
Sexless marriage effect on husband.
When it comes to sexless marriage with endometriosis, in my case as a husband, dealing with sexlessness due to endometriosis affected me emotionally and psychologically. There were times when I found myself having sexual fantasies about other women especially when the emotional gap started taking its toll.
But I have learned how to cope with these intrusive feelings. I am not saying it is easy, I’m a bloke, and I do have fantasies, but again, I cope in my own way. Go figure!
For many men, endometriosis may deteriorate their confidence levels, and even though married men feel that their neglected partners feel like a burden to them and feel unwanted, they cannot help, but escape into sexual affairs, which eventually breaks their marriage.
Marriage of convenience.
One of the most challenging decisions for some men is facing whether or not it’s good to marry a woman who has endometriosis.
So let me tell you this…
Loving a woman with endometriosis does not mean that it is a marriage of convenience in any way!
In fact, I would argue that loving someone who has endometriosis requires a tremendous amount of love, patience, and empathy. It can be incredibly challenging to watch someone you love go through so much pain and discomfort, but I believe that being there for them through it all is what true love is all about.
It’s important to remember that endometriosis is a medical condition that affects millions of women around the world. It’s not something that anyone chooses to have, and it certainly doesn’t define who they are as a person.
Instead, what defines a marriage is the love, trust, and commitment that two people share. It’s about being there for each other, no matter what life throws your way, and supporting each other through all of the ups and downs.
In my experience, loving a woman with endometriosis has only strengthened our bond and made our marriage stronger. It has taught me the importance of empathy, patience, and understanding, and I wouldn’t trade that for anything in the world.
So no, loving a woman with endometriosis does not mean that it is a marriage of convenience. It means that you have found someone who you love deeply and are committed to being there for, through thick and thin.
My take on endometriosis divorce rates.
Should I stay or should I go?
It can be tempting at times. Walking away sounds easier than being in pain all day every day but we both knew it wasn’t that simple nor doable having shared values strong enough beyond medical obstacles rather than sticking through could show others also in similar situations the possibility of finding success even where there seems none would present itself beautifully.
The divorce rate in the United States alone is currently about 50%. This means that for every 100 marriages, about 50 will end in divorce. However, the divorce rate is not the same for all couples.
It is higher for couples who are younger, have less education, and have lower incomes. It is also higher for couples who have children, and for couples who have experienced a major life stressor, such as the death of a loved one or the onset of a chronic illness.
The divorce rate is particularly high for couples where the woman is chronically ill. The divorce rate for couples where the woman has a chronic illness is about 75%. This is significantly higher than the overall divorce rate of 50%.
One study published in the Journal of Psychosomatic Obstetrics and Gynecology found that women with endometriosis were more likely to experience marital difficulties and have a lower quality of life than women without the condition. But it’s important for you to know that this study only looked at a small sample size and more research is needed to draw any definitive conclusions.
Remember that divorce rates are influenced by a wide range of factors, and endometriosis is just one of many possible factors that could impact a marriage.
Journey to finding the perfect marriage despite endometriosis.
Finding the perfect marriage despite endometriosis is a journey that can be challenging for anyone. Navigating the complexities of endometriosis can add an extra layer of difficulty. But with the right approach, you can build a strong, healthy relationship that can weather any storm.
Here are some tips I found that can help you survive the journey to finding the perfect marriage despite endo:
- Educate yourself.
- Communicate with her.
- Seek out support.
- Take care of yourself.
- Stay positive.
Knowledge is power, and the more you understand about endometriosis, the better equipped you will be to manage the condition. This includes understanding the symptoms, treatment options, and potential complications.
Open communication is key to any successful relationship, and this is especially true when dealing with a medical condition like endometriosis. Make sure that your partner understands what you’re going through and be honest about your needs and limitations.
Living with endometriosis can be isolating, but you don’t have to go through it alone. Seek out support from loved ones, online support groups, or professional counselors who can help you manage the emotional toll of the condition.
Managing endometriosis can be physically and emotionally exhausting for your partner, but also for you, so it’s important to prioritize self-care. This includes getting enough sleep, eating a healthy diet, and engaging in stress-reducing activities like meditation or exercise.
Remember that endometriosis does not define you or your relationship. Focus on the things that you love about your partner and your life together, and keep a positive outlook even during difficult times.
Finding the perfect marriage despite endometriosis is possible with the right mindset and support system.
By staying informed, communicating openly, seeking out support, prioritizing self-care, and staying positive, you can build a strong, healthy relationship that can withstand any challenge.
If you want to learn more about endometriosis, I wrote an “Endo-Tool, Endometriosis for Men” e-Book.
You can get the 1st Chapter of the e-Book for FREE, and if you like it, you’ll get a Whopping 33% Discount on the Whole Book, plus discounts on other helpful tools. You have nothing to lose but a lot to gain!
The first chapter alone contains all the comprehensive medical knowledge about endometriosis, including:
- What is endometriosis?
- What are the symptoms?
- What causes endometriosis?
- What does endometriosis look like?
- What are the stages?
- What are the types?
- What is adenomyosis and how is it related to endometriosis?
- Why do some women develop severe endo and others don’t?
- Does endometriosis cause infertility?
- How is endometriosis diagnosed?
- Do types and stages affect the treatment?
- Recurrence of endometriosis after excision surgery.
FREE Chapter of “Endo-Tool”
Endometriosis e-Book for Men
For those couples for whom love is not enough, the best option is reaching out for professional help to restore connection and communication in your relationship.
Love is a powerful force, but it’s not always enough to sustain a relationship on its own. Sometimes, couples may struggle to connect or communicate effectively, especially when dealing with the challenges of a medical condition like endometriosis.
In these situations, seeking out professional help can be a valuable option for restoring the connection and communication in your relationship. A licensed therapist or counselor can provide a safe and supportive space for you and your partner to work through any issues or conflicts that may be impacting your relationship.
Therapy can help you and your partner develop new communication skills, improve intimacy, and rebuild trust. It can also help you navigate the emotional ups and downs of living with endometriosis and find new ways to support each other.
Remember, seeking help is not a sign of weakness!
The marriage bed.
Think about this, the bed seems like a safe place for healing together.
Accepting that endometriosis impacts intimacy negatively may have attracted certain setbacks. So working it through while you disclose hesitations, making minor changes, or trying different methods can create a lot of bonding moments increase emotional closeness retaining marriage heat and true passion.
Marriage heat vs physical pain management.
Managing physical pain while also trying to maintain a healthy and intimate marriage can be a challenging balancing act. It’s important to prioritize both aspects of your life, but it’s also important to be mindful of your own limitations and to communicate openly with your partner.
Love always wins!
I found that shower-sharing sessions spark fires.
It teaches us to find love and pleasure amidst struggles because it causes rapid nervous system response reducing cortisol levels within the bloodstream and lowering anxiety-related disorders my wife suffers from. It calms her inflamed nerves leading towards natural muscle relaxation-inducing self-healing tendencies as well as eases cramps whilst increasing blood circulation.
It is especially helpful with my wife’s fibromyalgia flare-ups.
My advice would be to find alternative ways to express intimacy, such as cuddling or holding hands, or exploring different sexual positions or techniques that are more comfortable for you.
Managing physical pain while also maintaining a healthy marriage requires a balance of patience, communication, and a willingness to adapt.
Broken vow in marriage.
I am pleased to say there was no such thing for us. But broken vow in marriage isn’t uncommon, and overcoming this can take effort.
A broken vow in marriage might lead to a fractured end but the probable chances of healing require optimism and staying conscious with actions correcting make things better than continue worsening them apart what would have been viewed as an individual struggle best overcome joined forces altogether.
Living together and creating memories despite this debilitating condition strengthens relationships building stronger connections and making moments more valuable our experiences over time serve useful purposes stirring up curiosity within other couples facing similar challenges.
A final word on the perfect marriage despite endometriosis.
Having seen both sides of being patient and showing empathy alongside support adapting positively even amidst apparent medical difficulties allowed us to nurture the perfect marriage.
One filled with strength, communication love.
Loving a woman with endometriosis may pose challenging times at various stages of life, although much can be achieved by utilizing the tactics I gave you, giving hope toward improved quality of life is still achievable.
Love one another, that is all it takes to achieve the perfect marriage despite chronic illness such as endometriosis.
Hi, I’m Lucjan! The reason why I decided to create this blog was my beautiful wife, who experienced a lot of pain in life, but also the lack of information about endometriosis and fibromyalgia for men…